Playboy Mansion recap


So much to tell about the weekend. I may have to break it up in to a couple different posts so that I can focus on each event! As you can probably imagine, I have a splitting headache as a result of my Jack Daniel’s intake and lack of sleep. I always seem to be this way on Monday.

Friday: My friend Joy, who works at MTV networks, invited me to an after-party for the Spike TV Men’s Choice Awards which was being held at the Playboy Mansion. I had never been to the mansion, and was super stoked to see what it was all about.
After some pre party Vodka shots at my house, I hopped in a cab to meet Joy at the shuttle stop where they were taking peeps too and from the mansion. Joy looked fantastic! She is one foxy bitch. I often get drunk and throw myself at her, but she is a cockoholick and thwarts my advances.

We rolled up to the mansion at around midnight. The party was going off. They had bars set up around the pool. It was all the people form the Spike TV event, so it was a mix of celebs and people who work at MTV networks. Right when I walked in I ran into this slimy guy that I had hooked up with a couple months back. It was one of instances where in the middle of hooking up, i all of a sudden became grossed by him. I think it may have been the way his hair Gel smelled. He called me a bunch of times but I never returned his calls. It was a weird first moment to have, but I simply said hi and moved on.

I made a B-line for the bar and immediately ordered a glass of Jack on the rocks. (I had only been drinking Vodka before because I didn’t have anything else in the house). As I’m waiting for my drink, I heard a familiar voice. Of course, it was Diggs. I was mad at him because he had invited me to the party last week when we were at the studio, but then reneged because he wanted to bring some blond slut who he wanted to impress. She ended up getting food poisoning, so he was there solo. I immediately gave him a smack in the face, (he likes that sort of thing) and said, “thats what you get for ditching me”. He smiled and gave me a hug and squeezed my ass. Classic Diggs. Joy rolled up and told us that Jeremy Piven had been giving her sexy eyes. I was jealous because I find him to be delicious.

For the rest of the night, the three of us rolled around the mansion, checking out the various rooms. The game room was my favorite. I met a couple of guys here and there, but I was not really in the mood to make lame conversation with anyone. I was happy to be hanging with my friends.

After our third glass of straight booze we hit the dancefloor. There were playboy bunnies dancing mixed with corporate types. It was kind of a funny scene. In my head I always thought there would be chicks with there tops off making out and hot dudes rubbing them up with oil. But this party was more of a corporate event which oddly made the Playboy Bunnies seem a bit out of place.

Diggs ended up dancing with some skanky girl, while Joy and I lezzie danced. Even though she doesn’t hook up with me, she still like to grind with me on the dance floor, Lol. Favorite dancefloor moment was when Diggs was in the middle of talking about how he wanted to go home with the both of us and makout, while accidentally knocking my glass of Champagne (i had switched from the Jack) all over the dancefloor. The look on his face was amazing. He was trying to be all smooth but then pulled the ultimate jackass move. We all just started cracking up.

This vid of Diggs will give you an idea of the shape that we were in. I took this on the shuttle ride back from the mansion. You can’t really see anything, but the audio will give you the gist.

After the party we all ended up at Joy’s house. More shots, a little bit of group making out, but nothing crazy. I woke up at 1pm on the floor next to diggs. Joy was passed out, still in her party dress on the couch with underwear on her head. I have a vauge memory of doing that, but honestly I don’t really know what happend after 2am.

So in the end, the Playboy Mansion experience was not the dirty orgy that I thought it would be, but we had an amazing time none the less.

Here are some really bad photos from the party.



This was the man responsible for our inebriation. Nice red eyes!

More form the weekend to come in my next post.

One Response to “Playboy Mansion recap”

  1. tanlineless Says:

    just watched the video .. hilarious ! hehe

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